Ex 6-23: The Positive Feedback Circle. (20 minutes)

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🗣️ Introduction & Setup (3 Minutes)

Facilitator: For the next 20 minutes, we are shifting our focus to a superpower in civil discourse: the intentional use of positivity and validation [0:03].

Often, we view communication as just a way to trade facts or solve problems. But civility teaches us that how we make people feel during an interaction determines the future of that relationship. Positive reinforcement builds trust instantly.

To practice this, we are going to do a fast-paced ‘Positive Feedback Circle.’ I need half of the room to form a circle facing outward. Now, I need the other half of the room to form a circle around them, facing inward. You should be looking directly at a partner.

(Allow 30 seconds for positioning)

Here is how this works. You will have 2 minutes total with the person standing across from you. Your job is to offer that person a genuine, specific compliment, an expression of gratitude, or a positive observation based on what you have noticed about them during our program today. It could be about how they listened during a previous exercise, a point they made, or just their welcoming energy.

When the 2 minutes are up, I will ring this bell (or clap), and the outer circle will rotate one person to the right. We will repeat this for a few rounds. Don’t overthink it—just be genuine. Let’s begin!”

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⏱️ The Activity: Rotation Rounds (12 Minutes)

(Facilitator keeps time. Every 2 minutes, give a clear cue to rotate)

• Round 1 (2 mins): “Begin your first round of positive feedback!”
• Round 2 (2 mins): (Ring bell) “Time! Outer circle, take one step to your right. Introduce yourself if you haven’t met, and begin your positive feedback.”
• Round 3 (2 mins): (Ring bell) “Rotate to the right! Share what you appreciate about your new partner.”
• Round 4 (2 mins): (Ring bell) “Rotate again! Keep that positive energy moving.”
• Round 5 (2 mins): (Ring bell) “Next rotation. Focus on specific things they did or said today that made an impact.”
• Round 6 (2 mins): (Ring bell) “Final round! Make this your most impactful validation yet.”

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💬 Debrief & Reflection (5 Minutes)

Facilitator: “Time! Let’s pause there. Go ahead and take a seat back in our main circle.

(Allow 30 seconds to sit)

Look around the room right now. The energy, the smiles, and the volume in this room just skyrocketed in less than fifteen minutes. I want to ask the group two quick questions:

First, what felt more challenging—giving the positive feedback, or receiving it? Why do you think that is? (Pause for 2-3 brief responses from participants)

Second, how does it change the atmosphere of a room when people intentionally look for the good in each other rather than waiting for a mistake? (Pause for 2-3 responses)

Closing Thought: Civility isn’t just the absence of conflict; it is the presence of connection. When we intentionally offer kindness and recognition in our daily communications, we change the emotional temperature of our families, workplaces, and communities. Let’s carry this positive momentum into our next session. Thank you all!”

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