Civility is a set of behaviors based upon the seven commonly held values of: human dignity, respect, acceptance, intentionality, responsibility, constructiveness and public-spiritedness. A social, political and economic society must have some core beliefs, norms and behaviors. The modern renaissance of Civility attempts to define the beliefs, norms and behaviors so they can be shared and promoted. We need to be confident that we know what Civility is, how we should behave, how/why we should influence others and why the underlying principles make sense.
Public Spiritedness
The quality of caring about community welfare. Altruism is considering the public good rather than just personal interests. A sense of duty to consider the community good. Willingness to act on behalf of the community.
Communities of all sizes require individual members to value community interests, not just personal interests. They require individuals to internalize this idea, belief and value in order to make it a habit. Humans have evolved to be able to take and hold this perspective.
The key is for individuals to consider the common, public or greater good, not to be completely selfless. Public spiritedness is not a partisan value. Classical, moderate and progressive liberals promote this value. Classic and modern conservatives promote this value.
Some liberals and conservatives reject this principle. They rely on purely individual self-interest or religious, state or philosophical systems that do not require individual choices. I argue that this “radical individualism” is one of the 6 root causes of our current dysfunctional cultural situation.
Public-spiritedness is strongly supported by all religious and philosophical systems.
Judaism [Google AI]
Christianity
Islam
Buddhism
Hinduism
Taoism
Shintoism
Confucianism
Secular Humanism
Summary
The World Religions say :
The universe exists. We must harmonize with the fixed, structured, unchanging, known universe.
Community precedes the individual.
We are interdependent.
Community provides context for life.
We are obligated to participate in community.
We must serve our communities.
We must build our communities.
We should worship in community.
We must be loyal to our communities.
We should love our neighbors, follow the golden rule.
We should be compassionate towards others.
We should be charitable and generous towards others.
Reason matters.
Justice and social justice are logical requirements.
Peace and nonviolence are important within and between communities.
Truth, honesty and integrity are crucial virtues.
Ethical intent and behavior matter.
Individuals have clear duties and responsibilities to principles and communities.
Individuals should invest in their personal ethical growth.
Public-spiritedness is a universal value, virtue and principle. Reasonable people can wrestle with the trade-offs of personal and community interests. They should all agree that the public interest matters and must be considered. This is a universal value that society can use its power to impose upon members of society. This is very difficult for our ultra-individualist society to accept or embrace. Nonetheless, it is required. We should not hesitate to educate our children, set and enforce standards in our organizations, and promote this value throughout our society. It is required for “society”. We must not apologize.
Civility is a set of behaviors based upon the seven commonly held values of: human dignity, respect, acceptance, intentionality, responsibility, constructiveness and public-spiritedness. A social, political and economic society must have some core beliefs, norms and behaviors. The modern renaissance of Civility attempts to define the beliefs, norms and behaviors so they can be shared and promoted. We need to be confident that we know what Civility is, how we should behave, how/why we should influence others and why the underlying principles make sense.
Constructiveness
Constructiveness is the quality of being helpful, productive, and tending to build up or improve something, rather than destroy it, often involving positive contributions, useful suggestions, or fostering growth and development, as seen in “constructive criticism” or a “constructive attitude”.
Positivity focuses on maintaining an optimistic outlook and good feelings, while constructive thinking is about actively building solutions, using challenges as fuel for improvement, and taking practical action, contrasting with mere positive thinking that might ignore problems. The key difference is that positivity is an attitude, whereas being constructive is a process of building or fixing, often involving acknowledging negatives to create a better outcome.
Constructiveness is applied within the domain of civility to encourage individuals to be positive, interact, search for solutions and persist. It is affirmed by liberals and conservatives in different ways.
Left views on constructiveness emphasize the construction of new systems and social change, often with an emphasis on equality, progress, and reform. This approach views knowledge and social reality as a dynamic process that can be actively reshaped.
Right views on constructiveness emphasize the preservation and maintenance of existing social orders and traditions, often prioritizing authority, hierarchy, order, and stability. This view often relies on the idea of a “constrained vision” of human nature. Constructive action in this view often relies on private institutions and individual responsibility rather than expanded government intervention, and seeks to maintain founding principles or traditional values.
Constructiveness fits within the broad sweep of progress in modern society (500 years). It is an essential part of scientific, technical and commercial progress. Philosophically, it is supported by pragmatism. Constructiveness is a valuable principle because it is effective.
Constructiveness can be opposed if it is seen as a backdoor way of introducing a liberal bias into Civility. The philosophy of radical skepticism is incompatible with constructiveness. Constructiveness mistaken for utopian positivity is easily rejected. Other strongly negative experiences, philosophies or situations oppose it. The Civility value of Responsibility supports it. Constructiveness requires mental discipline, persistence, creativity, confidence and open-mindedness.
Constructiveness is supported by the Civility values of Responsibility and Intentionality which urge individuals to be fully present and own their choices and consequences in all environments. The Civility values of Human Dignity, Respect and Public-Spiritedness emphasize the need to be constructive in group environments and consider the needs and wishes of others.
Constructiveness is based on measured positivity and optimism, searching for possibilities at each stage of the decision-making or interaction process.
Constructiveness reflects a pragmatic modern belief in progress, reason and science, based on historical experience. It provides confidence and supports persistence.
Constructiveness is process-oriented, confident that varieties of the scientific method, logic, communications, group dynamics, business methods and instrumental logic can and will deliver results when applied. It recognizes the value of habits and the accumulation of skills, steps and wisdom through repeated experiences.
Constructiveness is proactive rather than passive or reactive. It focuses on delivering results or solutions aligned with shared goals rather than being critical, deconstructive, skeptical or merely ironic.
Constructiveness is both an emotional, willful commitment to engage and a confident belief in the effectiveness of modern decision-making and relationship development tools. It applies to both results and relationships.
Constructiveness leads to the consideration of diverse possibilities at every stage: resources, experts, information, frameworks, perspectives, creativity, combinations, win/win, compromise, good-enough steps, timeframes, decision-making tools, group and project management, delay, walk away, etc. It acknowledges that the real world is often “messy”.
Constructiveness focuses on improvements, changes and incremental progress rather than searching for a single, ideal, breakthrough solution. It supports multiple iterations and finds ways around roadblocks.
Constructiveness is broadly supported by the major religious traditions. [Google AI answers].
Judaism strongly supports “constructiveness” through core concepts like Tikkun Olam (repairing the world), encouraging positive actions, personal growth, community building, and channeling emotions productively, viewing humans as co-creators with God tasked with improving the world, not just passively living in it. It emphasizes building, enhancing, and transforming the world through ethical action, kindness, and responsible leadership.
Tikkun Olam (Repairing the World): A central idea focusing on social action, justice, and making the world a better place.
Co-Creation: Jews are seen as God’s partners in creation, responsible for improving and building up the world, not just dominating it.
Mitzvot & Ethical Living: Commandments and traditions guide individuals to act constructively, with emphasis on love, kindness (chesed), justice, and wisdom.
Positive Psychology: Modern Jewish thought integrates positive psychology, focusing on virtues like resilience, creativity, and happiness to strengthen Jewish life.
Constructive Criticism (Tochachah): The commandment to rebuke others is meant to be done privately, gently, and with love, fostering improvement, not destruction.
Channeling Emotions: Tradition teaches controlling and directing powerful emotions (like anger) into positive actions rather than letting them become destructive.
Christianity
Christianity strongly supports constructiveness, focusing on edification, building up believers and the community through encouraging speech, wise actions, and positive creation, emphasizing that what is permissible should also be helpful and build character, not tear down. Biblical principles highlight using words and actions to impart grace and promote spiritual growth, not unwholesome talk or destruction.
Biblical Foundations for Constructiveness
Edification: A core concept, meaning to build up or strengthen others spiritually (1 Thessalonians 5:11, Ephesians 4:29).
Helpful Speech: Believers are encouraged to speak only what builds others up and brings grace, avoiding unwholesome talk (Ephesians 4:29).
Discernment: Christians should ask if their actions are helpful, profitable, and edifying to their spiritual life (1 Corinthians 10:23).
Truth in Love: Offering correction and criticism should be done gently, with a sincere motivation to help others grow in righteousness (Ephesians 4:15, Proverbs 9:8).
Creation: Christians are called to be creative and contribute to the world, making something beautiful and useful out of God’s creation, reflecting good and wholesome things (Genesis 1:28-31).
Islam
Islam strongly supports “constructiveness,” emphasizing positive thinking, creativity, beneficial actions, community betterment, and using intellect for problem-solving, all within a framework of divine purpose and moral values. Islamic teachings encourage building a purposeful life, contributing to society, innovating for good, and engaging in positive communication and development, contrasting with negativity or destruction.
Purposeful Creation: The Quran highlights that creation has meaning, urging humans to live according to God’s plan and make life beneficial, not wasteful.
** Intellectual Engagement (Aql):** Muslims are encouraged to use their intellect (Aql) to find solutions and understand the wisdom in creation, fostering creativity.
Positive Action & Thought: Islamic practices like prayer, charity, and remembrance (dhikr) promote positive thinking and action for individual and societal welfare.
** Benefitting Humanity:** Islam values making useful contributions to the community and the world, integrating innovation with moral values for betterment.
** Effective Communication:** Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) exemplified effective communication, valuing all people and presenting messages in ways that are understandable and impactful, a key to constructive engagement.
** Innovation within Limits:** Creativity and technology are encouraged as long as they align with ethical values and don’t lead to harm or evil.
Buddhism
Buddhism strongly supports “constructiveness,” viewing it as essential for spiritual progress and liberation, evident in concepts like constructive karma (positive actions leading to benefit) and the transformation of negative tendencies into creativity and compassion, guided by the Eightfold Path and a focus on beneficial, skillful states of mind rather than harmful ones.
Buddhist concepts of constructiveness:
Constructive Karma (Kusala Karma): Actions, speech, and thoughts that are skillful, virtuous, and lead to well-being for oneself and others, directly contrasting with destructive actions, as taught in the Dvedha Vitakka Sutta.
Transformative Practice: Buddhism encourages turning self-centeredness into concern for others, negativity into creativity, and doubt into potential, fostering a positive inner revolution.
The Eightfold Path: This path provides a framework for constructiveness, emphasizing Right View, Right Intention, Right Speech, Right Action, and Right Livelihood, all aimed at creating positive conditions.
Constructive Phenomena: In Abhidharma, these are virtuous mental states like detachment, lack of hostility, and lack of naivety that support liberation.
Nirvana as Constructive: The ultimate goal, Nirvana, is described as stillness and constructiveness, a state beyond suffering and limitation.
Hinduism
Hinduism supports “constructiveness” through its philosophical, ethical, and metaphysical frameworks, primarily centered on the concepts of Sattva (purity/goodness), Dharma (duty/righteousness), and the creative-destructive cycle of the universe.
Taoism
Taoism does support principles that align with “constructiveness,“ but it is expressed through concepts that emphasize naturalness, simplicity, harmony, and effortless action (wu wei) rather than direct, forceful human intervention to “construct” in a Western, active-driven sense.
Key Taoist concepts related to a form of “constructiveness” include:
Harmony with Nature: Taoist thought emphasizes the need for humans to live in balance and harmony with the natural world and the Dao itself, which is the source and driving force behind the integration of all things. This balance is a form of natural “constructiveness” where one works with the flow of nature, rather than against it.
Wu Wei (Effortless Action): This principle is often misunderstood as total inaction. Instead, it means acting in a way that is aligned with the flow of the Dao, resulting in actions that are effective and constructive without struggle or force. The text Tao Te Ching suggests that by doing nothing (in the sense of acting unnaturally), nothing is left undone.
The Three Treasures: These core virtues of Taoism — compassion, frugality, and humility — provide a moral framework that naturally leads to a constructive and positive existence within a community and the world. Compassion involves sharing the sufferings of others and working for the happiness and peace of all beings.
Self-Cultivation: A common goal of Taoist practice is self-cultivation, leading to a more harmonious existence and a deeper appreciation of the Dao. This inner work is the foundation for constructive engagement with the world.
Water Logic: Taoism is often associated with “water logic,” which involves creative, flexible problem-solving and finding a better alternative by flowing around obstacles rather than confronting them directly. This approach is inherently constructive, focusing on effectiveness and positive solutions.
Shintoism
Shintoism strongly supports “constructiveness,” not as rigid moral laws, but through its core principles of harmony with nature, purification, fostering growth, celebrating life, and developing inner moral character, which all lead to positive, constructive actions and a prosperous, balanced life. The focus on cultivating purity, self-reflection (like Amaterasu’s withdrawal and return), and connecting with the life-giving Kami naturally encourages actions that build well-being for individuals and the community.
Key Elements Supporting Constructiveness:
Harmony & Nature: Shinto sees Kami (divine spirits) in nature, promoting respect and a balanced coexistence, essential for a sustainable, constructive culture.
Purity (Harae): Rituals and practices aim to cleanse impurity (kegare), purifying body, mind, and spirit for positive intent and action.
Growth & Prosperity: The religion is fundamentally life-affirming, focused on growth, happiness, and prosperity through connection with nature and benevolent Kami.
Inner Moral Cultivation: Practices like Chinkon (soul pacification) and the story of Amaterasu emphasize developing inner character, benevolence, and self-examination to overcome challenges constructively.
Contextual Ethics: Good or bad is judged by context, intention, and purpose, encouraging thoughtful, constructive responses rather than absolute rules.
Confucianism
Confucianism strongly supports “constructiveness,” not as a modern psychological term, but through core virtues like Ren (benevolence), Yi (righteousness), and Li (propriety) that guide individuals to build harmonious relationships, develop moral character, and contribute positively to society, emphasizing self-improvement and ethical action as constructive forces. While it encourages stability, it also values growth, adaptation in teaching, and managing conflict constructively within relationships through concepts like sacrifice and appropriate conduct, though emphasis on tradition can sometimes challenge radical innovation.
Ren(Humanity/Benevolence): Fosters empathy and care, motivating people to act for the good of others, which is inherently constructive.
Yi(Righteousness/Duty): Provides a moral compass, guiding individuals to do what is right, promoting ethical behavior and fairness in actions.
Li(Propriety/Ritual): Establishes proper conduct and social order, creating stable environments where people can interact constructively.
Self-Cultivation: Emphasizes continuous learning and moral growth, viewing adversity as a chance to develop virtuous traits and build inner strength, a very constructive process.
Constructive Conflict Management: In relationships, it promotes pro-relationship behaviors, like sacrifice, to manage disagreements and maintain harmony, notes this University Blog Service article.
Adaptive Teaching: Principles like “teaching according to aptitude” suggest flexible, person-centered methods to impart knowledge and morality, a constructive approach to education.
Secular Humanism
Secular humanism strongly supports constructiveness, viewing it as a core ethical principle for building a better world through reason, compassion, and human flourishing, even though it might be framed differently than in religious contexts, often focusing on human-centered betterment rather than divine mandates. Key tenets like improving life, fostering understanding, promoting societal progress, and using ethics for good align directly with “constructiveness,” emphasizing positive action and building ethical, thriving communities without supernatural reliance.
How Constructiveness Manifests in Secular Humanism:
Focus on Human Flourishing: The goal is to create a world where humans thrive, using critical thinking and empathy to solve problems and improve conditions.
Ethical Action: It promotes active, positive engagement in society to build justice, compassion, and understanding, rather than passive acceptance or reliance on divine intervention.
Rational Problem-Solving: Constructiveness involves using human reason and scientific understanding to address challenges and build better systems, from governance to social welfare
Community Building: Humanists strive to create strong, inclusive communities through dialogue, mutual respect, and shared responsibility, aligning with the “civility” values often discussed alongside constructiveness.
Combating Negativity: It stands against nihilism, despair, and destructive ideologies, promoting hope and proactive efforts for positive change.
Skepticism and polarization work against Civility. Constructiveness is a critical value that must be defined, taught, applied and turned into behavioral habits. The broad march of history is positive and constructive. Religious traditions require constructiveness for a good life. We must embrace this essential principle.
Civility is a set of behaviors based upon the seven commonly held values of: human dignity, respect, acceptance, intentionality, responsibility, constructiveness and public-spiritedness. A social, political and economic society must have some core beliefs, norms and behaviors. The modern renaissance of Civility attempts to define the beliefs, norms and behaviors so they can be shared and promoted. We need to be confident that we know what Civility is, how we should behave, how/why we should influence others and why the underlying principles make sense. Human dignity is the first principle or value underlying the Civility behaviors. It is a universally held value. In our skeptical, individualistic, subjective, relativistic era, it is essential for everyone to deeply understand the meaning of and broad support for this value. [9 Google AI summaries]
Judaism
Christianity
Islam
Buddhism
Hinduism
Taoism
Shintoism
Confucianism
Secular Humanism
Summary
Human dignity is at the heart of each worldview: image of God, gifted by God, preciousness of human birth, inherent divinity, self-so-ness, children of the kami, moral potential, shared humanity and moral agency.
Each worldview also has a complement to the solitary individual: public shaming, sanctity of life, sacredness of life, interconnectedness, one family, ancestral honor, roles, and rationality.
Human dignity is essential for any religious, political, philosophical, or social paradigm. Civility begins with “human dignity”.
New York Times columnist Ross Douthat says he began crafting this 2020/2021 book in 2014. He argues that we are stuck in a stagnant society that has lost its ability to reach for the future. Technological, space, business, economics, politics, ideologies, and cultural achievements in the arts, film and music have lost their dynamism. We are pictured as a weak shadow of 1945, 1965 or 1975.
He argues that stagnation eventually leads to decline or disaster. His preferred future contains “growth, innovation, aesthetic reinvention and religious ferment”. Any solution must contain “zeal, coherence, mysticism and futurism”. He outlines several possible paths to decline and further stagnation.
He also describes some potential routes to a renaissance. Modified Islam. African Christianity. Expanded Chinese influence. Massive African migration and impact on Europe. Illiberal democracies like Russia gain favor. Populism governs pragmatically. Local communities flourish in the communitarian model promoted by Patrick Deneen. Nationalism recovers its power. A revised global socialism. Pure scientism. Updated paganism or polytheism. A paradigm shift that makes religion a real option for educated elites, displacing the “materialist neo-Darwinian conception of nature”. A religious “great awakening” or new delivery mechanism. A merger of scientific and religious sensibilities that recognize our unique position as self-aware humans on planet earth.
Our columnist and critic evaluates the modern world much too negatively in my view. Despite challenges, the US and global economy is doing very well. It overcame the Great Recession and the Covid Pandemic. It is adjusting to Trump’s “tariff wars”. Growth is solid, trade is growing, employment is up. The business cycle is effectively managed. Productivity growth continues. These economies are resilient, reflected in stock market values. There are greater inequality and rent-seeking, which can be addressed politically.
Europe and other US allies are adjusting to Trump’s “America first” approach. They are adjusting to Russia’s threats and invasion of Ukraine.
Science progresses. Covid solutions. Weight control. Driverless cars. Smart phone capabilities. Artificial intelligence. Robotics. Modern satellite communications. Medicines. Fracking. Nanotechnologies. Green power. Electric cars. Blockchain and cryptocurrencies.
The ongoing integration of race, class, region and immigrants in the US continues. It’s not perfect but a solid majority embraces the multicultural US. Young Americans only know this positive world.
Many critics agree with Mr. Douthat that the arts and culture have stagnated. I’m not sure that marks “the end of civilization”. Today I have quick access to everything that has been offered for 100 years. We are culturally blessed.
The author invests several pages in analyzing Francis Fukuyama’s 1992 “end of history” claim. He agrees that the Western liberal democracies have fended off the BIG challenges of fascism and communism but notes that new and old critics have returned. He gives Fukuyama a fair treatment and notes his more recent focus on the role of “identity” in shaping political views.
Unfortunately, Mr. Douthat is not interested in refining “liberal democracy” as a solution to our alleged stagnation. He is critical of managerialism, technocracy and modern meritocracy. He sees it as inherently self-interested and narrow. I think that we have no choice but to invest in improving our historical “liberal democracy” framework.
I think the gap between science and the humanities remains even wider than it was in 1959 when CP Snow called out his educated colleagues. We need a way to connect science and religion, politics and people. The “structural” advantages of strong political, social and economic systems are not inherently opposed to human values. We should invest in closing this gap in our universities.
My followers know that I have become a “true believer” in the potential of “civility” to become formally defined and promoted as a shared cultural norm to support our political, social and economic institutions.
I wholeheartedly agree with his two real religious solutions. The default paradigm today is “science versus religion” and “science alone is real”. There is significant scientific and philosophical evidence to overturn this current worldview.
Many of our current challenges exist because we have not revised our laws and political structures to adapt to modern wealth, amoral political actors and media capabilities.
We could choose to invest in economic and breakthrough scientific progress by making political choices.
We could choose to support the modern “therapeutic society” approach of encouraging every child to “live a great life today” in pursuit of their self-actualizing possibilities.
We could invest in improving the productivity of our lagging economic sectors: government, education, health care and not for profits.
We could revise our goals to emphasize quality as equal to quantity.
We could invest in promoting communities of all kinds, not just those local, total communities suggested by Patrick Deneen.
We could do a better job of outlining. defining and communicating to everyone our 5-part political spectrum of left, center-left, independent, center-right and right. Individuals rarely change. We are stuck with each other. How do we effectively structure our political, social and economic systems to accommodate these different views?
Douthat argues that we have stagnated on all dimensions. We need to find a way forward. I agree with 2 of his options and offer a few more possibilities.
The national Republican Party was radicalized or very extreme by 2012. It is MUCH worse today.
Barrels of ink have been spilled describing and analyzing the “Trump phenomenon”. We were collectively shocked in 2016 when he won the presidency. The changes toward extremism, radicalism and the loss of our democratic system have continued. Like the proverbial frogs, we have become accustomed to the onslaught of change. I’ll try to outline and make sense of the mind-boggling transformation of the “party of Lincoln” in my lifetime from Dwight Eisenhower, Dick Nixon, Nelson Rockefeller, Ronald Reagan and the Bushes to Newt Gingrich, Arthur Laffer, Grover Norquist, Rush Limbaugh, Jerry Falwell, Pat Robertson, Charles and David Koch, Sheldon Adelson, Steve Wynn, Rupert Murdoch, Elon Musk and Donald Trump. 😦
Context
Pundits blamed the Trump 2016 election on a variety of false or half-true causes. Trump’s brand image and magnetic personality. His direct approach and truthfulness. A victory for the “Tea Party” after the slow Obama economic recovery. Renewed racism triggered by Obama in the White House. A normal left to right political swing. Hillary Clinton’s poor campaign and connecting skills. Clinton karma. The lure of the “authoritarian personality” in American culture.
I generally agree with the 2022 authors of American Psychosis. There have always been extreme groups attracted to and allied with the Republican Party. The party tolerated them, used them and then welcomed them. Their numbers and influence grew compared with that of the Main Street, Wall Street, moderate and New England wings of the party. They completed the hostile takeover of the party with Trump in 2016. [There have also been extreme groups affiliated with the Democratic Party].
I also agree with Edmund Fawcett’s long-term analysis. Conservatism was founded as a political perspective in opposition to ALL of the changes of modernity.
1500. New religion. New economics. Urbanization. Industrialization. Trade. Property rights. Individual rights. Skepticism. Science. Change. Loss of authority. Loss of history and tradition. Cultural challenges.
For most people, modernity was a very scary set of changes. For more than 1,000 years the rules of life were fixed. They were consistent in all dimensions. The religious, political, military, social and economic dimensions were aligned. Then changes occurred. A new paradigm called “liberalism” arose in opposition. Change is good. The individual is supreme and has rights. The dimensions of life can/must be separated. Certainty is gone. Social power is flexible. Competition and meritocracy are welcomed. Rationality and scientific proof are valued. Innovation and commercial success matter. “Anything goes”!
Conservatism emerged to provide a needed counterweight. History, tradition, community, values, virtues, nobility, safety, family, familiarity, neighbors, culture, language, experience, religion, race, stability, trust, and property.
Opposition to rapid change is a core conservative value. The emergence of a capitalist, commercial, scientific, university, secular class in competition with the landholding nobility and its religious and political allies was a founding perspective of conservatism. Today, we think of the Republican Party as the party of “big business”, capitalism, laissez faire, competition, social Darwinism, libertarianism and meritocracy. Yet, conservatism looks back to culture, community, religion, institutions, family, and morality. Economic and social conservatism are not fully or easily aligned.
The Republican Party has slowly, increasingly and then overwhelmingly become the party of social conservatism end economic populism. The trend was growing. Trump saw it and formalized it. The US experience is not unique. Other western countries have had the same recent experience. We have seen these tensions for two centuries or more.
A Slippery Slope
Many American conservatives have never truly embraced modernity, urbanization, industrialization, cosmopolitanism, equal rights, racial equality, trade, capitalism, global trade, international alliances, international treaties, religious denominations, ecumenicism, tolerance, immigration, etc. A secure life based upon familiar experience and community is great. The opportunities of progress are small, risky and filled with temptations and unintended consequences.
Successful politicians have two main talents. They deeply understand human nature, and they communicate very well. Conservative leaning politicians have mined the fear dimension of human nature for centuries. With the emergence of the mass media and modern advertising and persuasion tools circa 1920 they have become increasingly more powerful.
They set out to capitalize on the lack of deep political knowledge, skills and interests of the populace. The have moved down the slippery slope of skepticism, cynicism, fear, distrust and victimhood to hate.
They discovered that humans are naturally attracted to the Manichaean opposites of good and evil. They learned to define issues as yes and no, right and wrong, us versus them. Polarization is a very effective communications technique. Newt Gingrich demonstrated its value in 1992.
They learned to frame, highlight, emphasize and communicate effectively. Both parties’ leaders and supporters have always thought that they were morally right, and their opponents mistaken, misguided or much worse.
The Democrats have mainly been stuck in the 1800’s forward class wars occasioned by capitalism and the rise of manufacturing. Labor versus capital. Poor versus rich. Exploited versus exploiters. Rural farmers and laborers versus bankers and cities. Their issues and messaging matched.
Since 1960, the Democrats have adjusted to also become the party of “human rights” on a legal basis. Civil, women’s, disabled, LGBTQ, environmental, global, animal and earth rights on top of economic rights. The messaging has mostly remained the same, contrasting the exploited with the exploiters.
The Republican Party has offered a much more diverse, richer and expanded set of political messages. The messages are all about fear. The ideas, people and threats to fear have diversified and accelerated. THE IDEAS, PEOPLE AND THREATS TO FEAR HAVE DIVERSIFIED AND ACCELERATED. This very negatively biased view threatens our democracy.
Defense and Security
The Cold War. Reds under the bed. Pinko commies.
Korean War. “The loss of China”.
Vietnam War. The domino theory. All or nothing.
Hawks versus doves. Patriots.
Cuba.
Middle east “Arabs” versus Israel.
War on terror, Iraq, Afghanistan, Isis.
Axis of Evil.
Bomb, baby, bomb.
China.
Trump has added Venezuela, narcoterrorists, Canada, Mexico, Japan, South Korea, Greenland, Panama, Africa and Europe to those who cannot be trusted.
Eisenhower warned us about the “military-industrial complex”. It has managed to ensure that we are always at war with someone. Republicans have been the main hawks.
International Affairs
The US unilaterally defined the postwar rules at Bretton Woods, New Hampshire and joined the United Nations in San Francisco. The “America First” protectionists and unilateralists never really agreed. However, both parties supported the international system that cost-effectively protected American interests for more than 80 years.
Opposition to “foreign aid” was the first crack in the united front with politicians greatly exaggerating the amount of money invested and its ineffective usage. Foreign aid and health support levels fluctuated through time. Bush II was a proponent.
Historically, opposition to “free trade” was mostly a Democratic position. Alleged unfair power, rules, labor and environmental regulations. Republican global corporations were “all in”. Japanese, Asian, European and other third world competition offered higher quality and lower price goods to Americans who bought them in the 1970’s forward. Manufacturing job losses became a Republican issue as working-class Americans moved to the Republican Party from 1970-2020.
The US rejected the League of Nations. It tolerated the United Nations. The UN added a wide variety of international organizations. Republicans positioned the UN and these agencies as a waste of money supporting individuals, countries and organizations opposed to America. Trump defunded these organizations even as the World Health Organization played a key role in resolving the Covid pandemic.
The Paris Accords on climate change were another international agreement rejected by Trump, like the multilateral Iran nuclear proliferation limits.
NATO prospered for 70 years. Trump has questioned the rationale and his commitment to supporting our allies. He has badgered NATO and other allies to pay a greater amount for their defense. Trump renegotiated NAFTA with marginal changes. He has unilaterally applied tariffs to our neighbors and threatened to disband his own agreement.
Trump has threatened to invade Venezuela, Panama and Greenland because they allegedly threaten our security. He has removed many career foreign service staff members and politicized this vital national function.
The Economy
All politicians have criticized the opposition because inflation and unemployment are too high. Republicans claim that they are “the party of business” and more effective in managing the economy although the data says the opposite.
Republicans have claimed that Democrats wish to “socialize” the economy with the government owning and controlling all industries. No nationalization has occurred for more than a century. Deregulation of transportation in the 1970’s was a bipartisan initiative.
Republicans have exaggerated the size, scale, impact, employment and percentage of federal government activities for more than a century. Federal government activities DID increase very significantly during the Great Depression, WWII and the 1960’s Great Society initiatives. They have roughly remained at the same percentage of GDP since 1980.
Republicans have emphasized the “common sense” need to balance the federal budget and bemoaned the growing federal debt and its impact on future generations and “crowding out” of productive borrowing and investing. Their criticism rises when Democrats control the government and quiets when Republicans are in control as we have learned that 1-2-3% budget deficits seem to have no short or long-term deleterious effects. President Trump has no problem with running record budget deficits.
Republicans claimed that tax cuts would spur economic growth to offset the loss of revenue. The theoretical “Laffer Curve” has never been demonstrated to hold for the US. Republicans claimed that very high marginal income tax rates disincentivized highly productive Americans from working. Top marginal tax rates were cut from WWII 90% to 70% in 1965. Then lowered to 50% in 1981 and 37% or lower from 1986 forward. Grover Norquist and others after 1986 tried to “drown government in the bathtub” because “taxation is theft”. Bush I lost his reelection bid because of his “read my lips” reneged promise to not raise taxes.
Republicans claim that government regulations strangle businesses, cost money, reduce employment, stifle innovation, reduce R&D, and reduce investments. This is mostly a distraction. Regulations do require compliance costs for administration and reduced commercial activities. Corporations benefit from most drafted laws which provide opportunities for evasion and negotiation rather than strict compliance. If “clean” regulations were better they would ensure they were/are enacted.
Culture Wars / Wedge Issues
Civil rights legislation was supported by Democrats and Republicans. LBJ said “we may have lost the south for a generation”. He was right. The American South struggled with the aftermath of the Civil War, reconstruction and civil rights legislation. The belief that African-Americans should not mix with Whites died very slowly. New private schools were built to “solve the problem”. Court ordered busing to ensure equal racial opportunities in northern cities antagonized other Whites. Affirmative action court rulings divided the country, moving many Democrats to the Republican side.
Republicans made crime and drugs national issues. Directly and indirectly focusing on African-American communities.
Republicans made welfare a racial issue instead of a class, age or fairness issue.
The 1965 immigration act opened the door for poor immigrants from around the world.
President Reagan and congress agreed upon an amnesty and enforcement bill in 1986.
Bipartisan efforts to control migration were unsuccessful for the next 30 years. Trump pressured Congress to not approve a compromise bill in 2024. Trump has made immigration the center of his politics.
Education became a national political issue after the passage of the civil rights bills. Republicans advocated for “states’ rights” and the elimination of the federal “Department of Education”. The enforcement of equal racial access to public education drove these changes. The establishment of private Christian schools and the use of vouchers to fund them became a political issue.
Institutions
Historically, Republicans controlled all of the major institutions of the US. After “Brown vs. Board of Education”, they decided that institutions were not always perfect. The move of southerners from the “solid South” of Democrats to the Republican Party was a huge swing. Federal courts might not be trusted. Federal DOE might not be trusted.
The federal government was generally viewed as a positive entity based upon its activities during the Great Depression and WWII. Post-war investments in infrastructure were welcomed. The growth of federal employment, funding and power led to opposition by Republicans, claiming waste and inefficiency. Opposition to all federal staff and functions grew during the 1970’s and 1980’s.
Reagan framed it as “I think you all know that I’ve always felt the nine most terrifying words in the English language are: I’m from the Government, and I’m here to help.” In 1996, President Clinton said “the era of big government is over”.
Support for American institutions began to decline after Nixon’s presidency. His acts showed that it was possible that previously trusted institutions were no longer definitely trustworthy.
Republicans positioned “government versus business”. Business was trustworthy, subject to the iron laws of the market. Government was subject to the incentives of politicians and bureaucrats.
Entrepreneurs were positioned as wealth and job-creators. They were crafted as makers versus takers. Obama’s claim in 2012 for an equal role for the public sector sparked much political debate.
Republicans applied this negative theory to everyone. Bureaucrats were subject to the incentives of lobbying, influence, bribery and career advancement. Inherently untrustworthy. Regulators were subject to regulatory capture. Teachers were self-absorbed and union captured. Same with police and fire fighters.
Spiro Agnew began the attack on the broader cultural elites as the “nattering nabobs of negativism”. The attack on the supposed cultural elites in the university, arts, media, communications and not for profit space has continued.
Trump and his acolytes have used DEI as a wedge to force organizations to comply with his political wishes.
Republicans use the term “elites” to drive fear. Political officials, bureaucrats, professors, journalists, commentators, executives, bankers, media influencers, actors, musicians, lawyers, doctors, scientists, and public health officials. Where does this end? What about the Republican elites?
Trump has undercut any faith in institutions. DOJ and FBI politicized. All federal agencies politicized.
We no longer rely upon trust or principles. Everything is based on power and transactions. The conservative economic view seems to Trump the conservative social view in the end.
Individuals
Republicans have positioned the political world to help voters see themselves as victims or potential victims of the opposition. The evil opposition is ready to take away your: guns, religion, parental rights, language, teams, history, culture, music, voting power, flag, patriotism, money, house, medical care and rights. They have demonized the opposition as “radical leftists”. Democrats have responded with the same level of name calling. Republican leaders have chased the RINOS (Republicans in Name Only) out of the party.
Summary
Republicans have increasingly chosen fear to build and maintain their political support for 70 years. It appeals to the lowest common denominator of those motivated by fear alone. It is unsustainable. We will either have a major breakdown of our society/culture or a rejection of this negative worldview very soon.
Civility is a set of behaviors based upon a set of values. It is adopted and grown by individuals based upon their conscious and unconscious experiences. The practice of Civility tends to promote Civility in others. Unchecked incivility tends to destroy Civility. The practice of Civility depends upon a communications, interaction and problem-solving process. The social commitment to Civility depends upon the rate and intensity of practice and the frequency and impact of responses to incivility. Civility is a social value that is partly conscious and partly unconscious.
Chaos Theory
OK!!! Once we start to investigate dynamic systems, the words and concepts get abstract and “questionable” pretty quickly. Complex systems are unstable. Small changes can cause large impacts. I share this because I think that Civility is a social system subject to this kind of dynamic, nonlinear change.
Emergent Systems
OK!!! Civility is an emergent property of people interacting. Simple, positive interactions promote more positive interactions. AI is trying to describe the idea of virtuous cycles and vicious cycles on a knife’s edge. Civility is a fragile concept and practice.
Managing Incivility
We have mixed advice. Some uncivil behaviors are so toxic they must be opposed. Yet, limiting free speech is against the core beliefs of Civility.
Civility, like other cultural norms, does not disappear quickly, it persists.
Tipping Point
Civility is positioned to survive. There are many individuals and groups with the incentive and capability to defend and promote Civility.
Summary
Overall, I am optimistic about the survival and progress of Civility today, December 15, 2025.
POST SCRIPT
In the process of using Google AI today, I am now EXTREMELY CONCERNED THAT THE SINGULARITY IS ABOUT TO OCCUR SOON. The responses to my complex questions are at least an order of magnitude more insightful than they were just a few days ago!
Civility has operated for a few hundred years without a brand manager. It has acquired several unfortunate associations through the years. It is commonly seen as just surface level politeness and etiquette, a magic wand problem solver, an impractical emotional approach or an apologist for passivity, power, the status quo, righteousness, the right or the left. Properly defined, Civility is not an easily discounted simplistic answer to our cultural challenges.
Civility Is …
Civility is a set of behaviors that recognizes differences and builds mutual respect: self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, relationship management, communications, growth and problem solving.
It is based on 7 nonpartisan values: human dignity, respect, acceptance, responsibility, intentionality, constructiveness and public-spiritedness.
Inherently Complex
Civility is primarily a set of habits, skills or behaviors that are used to interact with others. There are 7 groups and many specific behaviors in applied Civility. These behaviors are learned, applied, improved and based upon modern behavioral science.
There are also 7 values, principles or virtues that lie beneath the behaviors. They are nonpartisan, commonly held ideas consistent with many political, religious and philosophical systems.
These values have been identified through time as being necessary for effective interactions. They are not derived from any specific religious, political or philosophical system. No one value is the basis for the system, although “human dignity” seems to have the greatest power in driving behaviors and inspiring commitment to Civility. Descriptions of individual behaviors are shaped by the values. There are clear expectations of good behaviors and contrasting taboos.
Civility requires a commitment to engage with others in order to effectively communicate and resolve differences. As such, extraverts have a natural advantage in practicing Civility. Fortunately, the modern behavioral sciences provide training and experiences to help introverts to be “fully effective” even if it requires greater effort.
Civility embraces thinking, feeling and doing. The values and behaviors require all 3 dimensions of life.
The behaviors are inherently practical, applied and specific. The values are more abstract, intellectual and philosophical.
Embracing and applying Civility requires practical and abstract thinking, feeling and doing.
Civility emphasizes “perceiving” in its human dignity, respect, acceptance, constructiveness and public-spiritedness values. It emphasizes “judging” in its responsibility and intentionality values.
Civility focuses inward with self-awareness and self-management skills. It focuses outward for communications, social awareness and relationship management. It balances the needs and importance of the individual with those of the community.
The Whole Process
The Civility model focuses on the process of personal interactions to solve problems and manage relationships. It assumes repeated interactions that encourage participants to invest in relationships and seek long-term results. The process is expected to be iterative, encouraging participation and engagement. Results are not predetermined. Goals are clarified. Positions are shared. Solutions are proposed. Feedback and responses are welcomed. Choices are negotiated. Civility assumes a dynamic process is employed.
Civility skills and values are held by all individuals. They acquire these views throughout life. They apply these conscious and unconscious approaches in all areas of life, formal and informal. Civility norms and expectations are different in different groups and settings. Civil behavior encourages civil behavior. Uncivil behavior is sometimes shunned, encouraged or accepted. A virtuous cycle or a vicious cycle can occur.
Civility values and skills are learned and perfected through application, usage and feedback.
Nonpartisan
Civility is actively nonpartisan. Its proponents accept the results of “Moral Foundations Theory” that there are 6-9 deeply held human views that underly political (and some religious) beliefs. Individuals and political groups disagree about which are most important. Civility is not positioned to resolve these differences. It is designed to help well-meaning individuals understand each other, find common ground and negotiate results that also support relationships and the process. Civility offers a process that allows individuals and groups to maintain their views and still work effectively with others.
Civility attempts to avoid its own “righteousness”. It offers a tested process to facilitate certain interactions. It does not claim to have final religious, political or philosophical answers. It does not claim that its values, behaviors and processes will always produce good results or resolve conflicts. It acknowledges that our understanding of values and ability to implement them through behaviors is imperfect. It recognizes that “best practices” in any of the social sciences evolve through time. Civility attempts to make explicit its values, beliefs and understandings and promote them in clear, transparent ways.
Human dignity, respect and acceptance require a mature perspective. They are not easy to deeply understand, practice or master. They focus on the essence of individuals in a social environment.
Responsibility, intentionality and constructiveness are also “stretch” values. They also require us to consider the required relationship between the individual and others. It is not simple. Our obligation to others requires perspective and some broader moral framework. Building a commitment to these values requires feedback, support, experience and moral perseverance.
Public-spiritedness also requires a balance between the individual and the environment. Aside from a few saints, humans are not capable of living solely for others. They must balance these needs, wants and desires. Civility does not define how much “public spiritedness” is enough. It requires each individual to consider this difficult topic.
Summary
Civility encompasses values and behaviors, a dynamic process and personal growth. It offers a process solution to our common differences and potential conflicts. It has many component parts that change through time for each person. The core components can be learned and applied by everyone. The basics are easy. Practicing and perfecting Civility values and skills is the good work of a lifetime, worthy of our human dignity.
Civility is a set of behaviors that recognizes differences and builds mutual respect: self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, relationship management, communications, growth and problem solving.
It is based on 7 nonpartisan values: human dignity, respect, acceptance, responsibility, intentionality, constructiveness and public-spiritedness.
Civility is required for a representative democracy to thrive. Citizens must practice and embrace these habitual behaviors. Social norms must press individuals to adopt these beliefs and improve their behaviors, despite the call of opposing forces.
Civility has declined in the United States of America since the 1960’s cultural revolution and the 1980’s Reagan revolution. Individualism has ascended [perhaps too far]. Religion and culture have lost influence. Many today are working to rekindle Civility as a core set of values and behaviors necessary for a society of free individuals to succeed.
In broad terms, I have identified 6 threats to our society. I’d like to outline how Civility can be used to address these challenges. Civility alone cannot save our society, but it has the ability to prevent us from spiraling down in a vicious cycle. Civility has the ability to trigger a virtuous cycle. It is a catalyzing and leveraging force.
Radical individualism dispenses with community, society, religion, morality and philosophy. ONLY the individual now matters. Many of us have unintentionally adopted this faulty worldview: in whole or in part.
Civility begins with the claim that every person possesses INFINITE human dignity.
This is an individualistic start. But it is paired with the logical complements of respect and acceptance. If I have infinite human dignity, then all others must also have infinite human dignity. They MUST be respected. They MUST be accepted. They are not perfect, faultless, better or good. But they have the same potential for good and excellence that I enjoy.
This insight requires me to try to be self-aware, to manage myself, to be aware of others and to responsibly and intentionally manage my relationships with others. “I’m OK, You’re OK”.
Civility calls on us to be positive and constructive, not as a weak Pollyanna view but as individuals who are hopeful, who seek to find the greatest possible results.
Civility embraces public-spiritedness. It acknowledges that we live in community at all times and are responsible to consider our community obligations. We are not called to blindly accept community views, norms or decisions. But we always consider our civic and community duties and responsibilities.
Humans are never satisfied with what they have. We compare themselves to others and come up short. Our logical reasoning is imperfect. We focus on losses, the short-term, concrete items and anchors.
Civility accepts our weaknesses. It encourages us to look outwards to our neighbors to really evaluate ourselves. It promotes the “rough and tumble” of interpersonal engagement in informal and formal life. Civility guides us to be self-aware and self-managing. Civility recognizes that personal growth is an ongoing process. We cannot simply digest best practices intellectually; we must experience them.
Skepticism
Healthy scientific skepticism is fine. Unfortunately, we have often come to reject everyone and every fixed idea. Political polarization has undermined any sense of the “common good” or objective reality.
Civility embraces positivity and constructiveness. We should always pursue and consider positive opportunities.
Responsibility and intentionality require us to step above the situation and assess it objectively. We cannot take the shortcut of simplistic naive kneejerk skepticism.
Civility embraces modern behavioral and cognitive science. It uses rational modern decision-making tools. We have much stronger insights into true human nature. It is imperfect but we are better positioned to purposely lead great lives.
Despite the intellectual attraction of skepticism, America has prospered economically for 250 years. It has demonstrated that a democratic republic can succeed. The US has overcome two world wars, the Great Depression, the Vietnam War, the cultural revolution of the 1960’s, the Cold War, the Great Recession, the Covid pandemic and populism.
Religion has not died. Utilitarianism is barely remembered. Atheism is mostly rejected. Simplistic philosophies are inadequate. Scientific progress marches forward. Pure scientific rationalism loses support as a philosophy of life. Nietzsche and existentialism forced men to face the prospect of meaninglessness and we have survived. Self-awareness and social awareness help us to understand the complexity, contradictions, inconsistencies and mysteries of real life.
Imperfect Myths
Modern worldviews generally fail to replace the peace and answers of the ideals of Christendom. Civility offers a set of values and behaviors that support the practical operation of modern life with its greatly enhanced diversity.
Civility supports the 4 deep challenges of: facing death, finding a purpose beyond self, being affirmed and living as a social being in community. The commitment to human dignity, respect and acceptance help with the need to be affirmed. I’m OK, You’re OK. Civility promotes the social, interactive, growing, dynamic person. It offers a safe environment where individuals can pursue religious perspectives. It emphasizes the role that the “other” can play in personal growth.
Civility does NOT replace any of the religious, historical, cultural and national myths that have addressed human needs in the past. Civility is a set of values and behaviors that allows for constructive interactions in all areas and levels of society despite our differences. It does not choose sides in religious, political and philosophical debates. It is a necessary, but insufficient basis for modern life.
Our Secular Age
Civility accepts that we cannot easily find final deterministic solutions to the great questions of life. We have experienced 600 years of modernity without finding rational, objective, scientific, secular answers. Civility provides a social platform that supports religious belief. It supports debate on difficult subjects. It focuses on how we can live together, accept and overcome our real differences.
Our Secular Age is one in which the biggest questions – about God, man and meaning – don’t have consensus answers. No single denomination or ecumenical group holds a dominant worldview. Atheists, agnostics and “none of the above’s” are a large and fast-growing group, especially among younger age cohorts.
The loss of certainty creates existential angst for citizens. Civility responds with “human dignity” as a core belief that elevates individuals and the human condition to something of importance, a matter of ultimate concern for all. Civility offers “acceptance” as a central value, acknowledging that different backgrounds, experiences and beliefs are to be expected and welcomed. Civility encourages a positive, constructive approach to our lack of consensus on political, religious and philosophical topics. Civility promotes the virtues of responsibility, respect and initiative as tools for the required interactions with others – on topics large and small.
Finally, Civility focuses on behaviors, habits and norms of practical interaction as being most effective in living actual lives in a Secular Age. The Protestant Reformation triggered centuries of religious conflict. The principles of Civility were used to heal this divide and can apply to our differences today.
Insecurity
Modern man is surrounded by uncertainty as he is forced to make more decisions in more areas with more choices than ever before. Most of us try to ignore the surrounding forces and live our lives day to day as best as we can. We implicitly adopt some kind of philosophy of life. We stay busy. We pursue goals. We consider the changes in our worlds. But the underlying tensions make life difficult. Economic and personal striving are a cultural norm. Polarized politics is hard to avoid. It’s difficult to relax, center and fully engage in life. We treasure peace and certainty. We’re still looking for answers that work well in a world filled with options and choices.
Civility’s focus on human dignity, respect and acceptance of each person and others serves to build a strong sense of self-worth. The self-awareness and self-management skills reinforce this central validation of each person.
The values of responsibility, intentionality and constructiveness reinforce the solid self with positive real-world experience and reinforcement. The social awareness, communications and relationship management skills operationalize this good intent.
Collectively, the Civility values and behaviors provide personal assets to be successful in a challenging world. They address the need for frequent interactions with “others”. They provide confidence that individuals have the capabilities and experience to thrive in difficult situations because they have managed them before.
Summary
Civilization and daily life are guided by unspoken norms and beliefs. We have experienced significant changes in the past century that undermined the consensus view and now requires individuals to consciously consider a greater share of their daily lives. We have not reached a new consensus and may not do so anytime soon. As we work through these differences we need to reinvest in Civility skills, habits and understanding. Civility helps us individually, in groups and as a society to interact effectively despite our differences. We don’t need perfection or infinite improvement, but we need to invest in Civility and use its power as a self-reinforcing system or virtuous cycle to guide us into the future.
Civility is a set of behaviors that recognizes differences and builds mutual respect.
Self-awareness
Self-management
Social awareness
Relationship management
Communications
Growth
Problem-solving
Self-Awareness
Emotional Awareness – Identifying and understanding our emotions and their impact on our thoughts, behaviors, and others. Accurate Self-assessment – Clearly understanding personal strengths and limitations without self-criticism or inflated self-perception. Self-confidence – Firmly believing in one’s abilities, talents, and judgement. Self-respect – Properly regarding and caring for the dignity of one’s person and character. Authenticity – Acting in accordance with one’s true self, values and beliefs.
Self-Management
Emotional Self-control – Managing and regulating one’s emotional responses, preventing impulsive reactions. Adaptability – Flexibly and efficiently learning and applying that knowledge across situations. Achievement Motivation – Orientation towards success, mastery, and sense of purpose. Initiative – Recognizing needs, taking action, and pursuing outcomes without waiting for direction. Optimism – A mental attitude characterized by a positive outlook and expectations of favorable outcomes. Apologizing – Acknowledging errors and guilt, expressing regret, repenting, asking for forgiveness. Trustworthiness – Demonstrating credibility, reliability and intimacy buffered from self-interest. Resilience – Bouncing back from adversity with flexibility & strength, maintaining wellbeing despite challenges.
Social Awareness
Empathy – Understanding what other people feel, seeing their point of view, and imagining yourself in their place.
Organizational Awareness – Interpreting a group’s emotional state, relationship dynamics and power structures.
Service Orientation – Willingly anticipating, recognizing, and meeting others’ needs, before they are articulated.
Perspective Taking – Considering others’ thoughts, feelings, intentions, and motivations in a particular situation.
Cultural Awareness – Recognizing the different beliefs, values, and customs of someone based on their origins.
Relationship Management
Influence – Capacity to affect the character, development, or behavior of another person, group, or organization.
Conflict Management – Process by which disputes are resolved, negative results are minimized and positive results are prioritized.
Teamwork and Collaboration – Combined effort of a group of people working together towards a common goal or objective.
Inspirational Leadership – Inspiring and guiding people to get the job done, to bring out their best.
Change Management – Providing approaches, tools, and techniques to achieve a desired future state.
Collaboration Tools – Offering any technology or tool that can be used to help people to better work together.
Meeting Management – Organizing and facilitating meetings to ensure productivity and alignment.
Project Management – Planning, organizing, and executing tasks to create a tangible product, service, or deliverable.
Communications
Commonality – Finding and emphasizing common interests, perspectives and experiences.
Be Patient – Encouraging others to speak, not interrupting them.
Overall Awareness – Paying attention to non-verbal cues, overall message of speakers.
Recognize/Validate Others – Listening, remembering and using names, acknowledging others’ views and emotions.
Mirror Communications – Confirming listening by restating what you heard in your own words.
Speak Kindly – Using words that are neutral or supportive, not attacking others.
Understand – Asking questions, clarifying, seeking first to understand, not to reply.
Manage Praise – Giving and receiving praise for communications, actions, intentions and results, when appropriate.
Defend Properly – Defining boundaries, expressing views in “I” statements, not overreaching.
Solve the Problem – Focusing on issues, not people.
Electronic Communications – Effective email and social media communications.
Growth
Experiential Learning – Benefiting from the experience and natural results of participating in civil processes. Continuous Improvement – Maintaining newly developed skills and skill levels with support from civil colleagues. Embracing Feedback – Encouraging honest feedback provides opportunities for personal growth. New Perspectives – Gaining new approaches, viewpoints and paradigms from interacting with others. Higher Expectations – Improving goals and behaviors in response to the expectations/norms of others. Confidence – Using civil processes to address and resolve difficult situations builds personal and process confidence. Broadly Applying Skills – Trying, testing and using civility skills in all domains of life. Modelling Behaviors – Practicing civility skills helps to teach, influence and inspire others. Developing Others – Recognizing and nurturing potential in others through encouragement and honest feedback.
Problem-Solving
Analytical Tools – Critical thinking, decision making, game theory, finance, economics and operations management.
Creative Thinking – Thinking about a task or a problem in a new or different way, or generate new ideas.
Strategic Thinking – Intentionally and logically making organization level decisions with long-term impacts.
Organizational Design – Improving an organization’s effectiveness and performance.
Organizational Development – Structuring an organization to align with its strategic goals and objectives.
Systems Thinking – Cognitive skill and a way of understanding reality that emphasizes the whole rather than the sum of its parts.
Process Engineering – Approach to designing, analyzing, and optimizing steps to produce a consistent, repeatable outcome.
Public Administration – Coordination of government activities to ensure the effective delivery of services and the application of laws.
Summary
We have lost our commitment to civility in our interactions with each other in the last 50 years. On the other hand, we understand exactly how and why we should act civilly. We can learn about acting civilly within all of our institutions, setting aside our political differences. The behavioral sciences have clearly described the practice of civility. We now have the ability to learn and sharpen our civility skills. We must implement this training for our children and our fellow citizens.